Today I made a comment on a social website about an issue that is dividing people and in some cases even members of the Church. I then read through my comment and realized that what I said needed a follow up comment because it could be viewed as offensive. Then after reading that comment I realized that my clarification statement could be viewed as offensive to someone else. Realizing that saying anything at all put me on either side of the issue I now found myself smack dab in the middle of a debate I originally wanted no part of and that making a comment literally dirtied my hands. In this case, I had strong feelings about people who had strong feelings, but after making my comment I realized there was no place for it and I just made myself a part of the ugliness of the issue. It would have been good for me to do a little research/studying so I knew where I stood on the issue, but it didn’t mean that I needed to say anything about it. The insight on my hands being dirtied by saying something lent me new information I had never considered before and I literally witnessed a paradigm shift – and I’m grateful for that!
So, since this little experience I have found myself wondering when it would be appropriate to say something or not to say something. Here’s a couple of things I learned for myself.
- Determine what the issue is even about and how big of a role does the advesary have in it (if it’s a lot then stay FAR AWAY!)
- Do I know anything about this subject? (i.e. what do General Authorities or the scriptures have to say about it)
- Will saying anything help? (Filters: Does this need to be said? Does it need to be said by me? Does it need to be said right now?)
- I would say that most of the time I would best serve my fellow men by not saying anything at all. This does not mean however, that I shouldn’t say anything to my children. If there is an issue I feel strongly about I do need to let them know how I feel (and not always with words) and that is probably about as far as that needs to go.
I am really going to work hard on this. I am grateful for gentle corrections from the Spirit and the opportunities I am given every day to change for the better.